By Christopher Moore
Continued from Part One:
The Constitution.
America’s most quoted, least read, most tattooed document.
People love to thump it, wave it around, print it on T-shirts, and tattoo bald eagles over their ribs like they’ve memorized the whole thing. Spoiler: they haven’t.
The founding fathers practically begged us not to screw this up. George Washington literally warned us about political parties. He saw the future. And here we are—worshipping political parties like they’re college football teams and letting politicians cosplay as freedom fighters.
You can’t cherry-pick the Constitution like you’re ordering off a drive-thru menu.
You don’t get to thump the Second Amendment and then light the First on fire when someone says something you don’t like. You can’t love the Constitution when it backs your team and ignore it when it calls out your favorite mascot.
Right now, politicians treat the Constitution like a photo prop. Trump waves it around when it suits him but shreds the Fourth Amendment when the surveillance state lines his pockets. Democrats scream about protecting democracy, but they skip the legislative process the second their bills don’t pass.
Remember when Congress was supposed to write the laws? Now they’re too busy rage-posting on Twitter.
The First Amendment guarantees free speech—but somehow, if you say the wrong thing, the left wants to cancel you and the right wants to blacklist you. Free speech isn’t free anymore—it comes with a warning label and a comment section full of digital fistfights.
The Second Amendment? Republicans worship it like gospel. Democrats treat it like it’s a ticking time bomb. Meanwhile, people like me—responsible gun owners—are over here sipping coffee, wondering why nobody can figure out how to keep guns away from idiots without punishing the rest of us.
The Fourth Amendment? Gone. Torched. Thanks to years of bipartisan spying that we just kind of… let happen. But hey, at least TikTok’s still free, right?
And the Tenth Amendment? The janitor of the Constitution. Ignored. Forgotten. States’ rights only matter when they’re politically convenient. The rest of the time, Congress is happy to bulldoze them.
Here’s the ugly truth: our politicians use the Constitution like a buffet. They grab the parts they like, toss the rest in the trash, and pretend they’re defenders of liberty.
And we, the people? We let them. Because we’re too busy playing Red vs. Blue, like this is the playoffs.
The Constitution is not complicated. It’s limits. It’s rights. It’s literally designed to keep the government’s grubby hands out of your life.
But right now? It’s just a costume.
Maybe it’s time we stop printing it on coffee mugs and actually read the thing.
All of it.
Even the parts that don’t fit on a bumper sticker.
-The Gun Loving Hippie Dad … Who Fixes Stuff
Keep reading
The Bipartisan Circus Part One: Republicans, Democrats, and Other Dangerous Animals
Read the first Bipartisan Circus essay.
The 9th Amendment: The One They Don’t Want You to Know About
A closer look at an often-overlooked amendment.
